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Author Topic: Do Not Eat  (Read 18412 times)

Jeff Anonymous

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« on: July 26, 2001, 03:44:49 PM »
WEBCAM:  Woefully Explodes Bowels...'Cause Actually Metal.

MIC:  Massive Intestinal Cramps

PENTIUM CHIP:  Poor Esophagus...Not Truthfully Useful Meaningfully.  Can Hurt Intestines, Parts.

NIC: Nasty Internal Cuts (NIC=Network Interface Card)

HUB: Hurts Ur Body

DISC:  Does Injure Someone's Colon

UPS: Ugh.  Pierced Stomach. (UPS=Uninterruptable Power Supply)
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Angela Brett

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #1 on: July 26, 2001, 08:38:18 PM »
LOL... great ones. :)

HARD DRIVE: Hardly A Readily Digestible Diet... Rarely Is Vitamin Enriched.

KEYS: Keep External [to] Your Stomach!

GRAPE IMAC: Gag, Retch... Argh! Purple Equipment Isn't Meal... Actually Computer!

In case anyone hasn't noticed, this thread is about the Computers:Do Not Eat category.
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Dundee

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #2 on: July 26, 2001, 11:09:31 PM »
I/O PORT : Internal Organs Panicking Over Recycled Trash

MONITOR : Men Omit Nutrients Inducing Tremour Over (at) Rectum      (yuk!!! gross !!!)

ENTER : Enter Now, Then Exit (at) Rear

MOUSE : Munch Onions Until Something Emits  (excuse me)
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Jeff

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #3 on: July 27, 2001, 07:12:07 AM »
PRINTER:  Pitiful Rectum Injured.  Never Try Epson Rolls!

CABLE MODEM:  Can Anyone Bite Large Exterior?  May Obviously Damage Entrails, Ma'am.
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Tony

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #4 on: July 27, 2001, 08:16:50 AM »
SCREEN
Someone Cannot Readily Eat Electronic Noticeboard

DISC DRIVE
Digestion Is Seriously Challenged. Diet Requires Increasingly Varied Elements.

SCANNER
Should Cause A Nauseous Nasty Enteric Reaction

ZIP DISK
Zounds! I'm Protein Deficient - If Somewhat Kosher.

MICROPHONE
Might I Chew Resolutely On Portable Hardware, Obtaining Nutritional Essences?

BATTERY
Bit Acidic, Though Tough Exterior Repels You.
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Angela Brett

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #5 on: July 27, 2001, 08:12:51 PM »
Wow, this thread is really entertaining! I was laughing the whole way through.

BYTE
Beware, Your Teeth Electrocuted!

MOTHERBOARD
Mother Of Too-Hard Eating! Ridiculously Broad - Oesophagus Actually Ruptures Dangerously!

I was thinking another version of that could start with Makes One's Teeth/Tummy hurt... can anyone finish that off?
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Tony

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #6 on: July 27, 2001, 08:17:16 PM »
>>> On 27 July 2001 08:12:51 UTC, Angela Brett wrote:

MOTHERBOARD
Mother Of Too-Hard Eating! Ridiculously Broad - Oesophagus Actually Ruptures Dangerously!

I was thinking another version of that could start with Makes One's Teeth/Tummy hurt... can anyone finish that off?

Brilliant Angela - How about including references to your beloved Apple (edible in another incarnation ;-)

Make One's Teeth Hurt Eating Respected Bits Of Apple's R & D
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Angela Brett

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #7 on: July 28, 2001, 02:14:14 AM »
CHEF: Computer Hardware Enters Food!
COOK: Cuisine Out Of Kilobytes!
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Steve Keate

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #8 on: July 28, 2001, 02:14:27 AM »



>>> On 27 July 2001 08:12:51 UTC, Angela Brett wrote:

Wow, this thread is really entertaining! I was laughing the whole way through.

BYTE
Beware, Your Teeth Electrocuted!

MOTHERBOARD
Mother Of Too-Hard Eating! Ridiculously Broad - Oesophagus Actually Ruptures Dangerously!

I was thinking another version of that could start with Makes One's Teeth/Tummy hurt... can anyone finish that off?
--
Here goes:

makes one's teeth hurt, eventually removing broken ones, and requiring dentist.
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Tony

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #9 on: July 28, 2001, 08:22:28 AM »
SILICON CHIP
Suggest It's Low In Calories? Objection - Not Considered High In Polyunsaturates!

APPLE COMPUTERS
All Plastic Parts Lack Edibility - Chewing On Metal Parts Usually Touches-off Excruciating Rectal Spasms.
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Angela Brett

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #10 on: July 28, 2001, 01:09:16 PM »

SInce I've done GRAPE IMAC, I probably should do the other flavours of iMac as they're the most likely computers to be mistakenly eaten.

STRAWBERRY IMAC: Started To Retch, And Wondered 'Bout Edibility. Really Really Yucky, It's Main Aftertaste's Copper.

TANGERINE IMAC: This Apple's No Good! Even RAM Is Not Edible. I'm Making A Complaint!

LIME IMAC: Licking It Made Evident It Maybe Ain't Citrus.

BLUEBERRY IMAC: Bad Luck, Underfed Ethiopians... Barely Edible Repast. Return Yours, I'll Make A Casserole.

Hmm, I don't like the last one too much. But it gave me an idea for the start of this one... can anyone finish it?

IMAC SPECIAL EDITION: It Makes A Casserole So Plasticky, Everyone Chokes! ...
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Angela Brett

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #11 on: July 28, 2001, 05:54:14 PM »

You're missing an I. Maybe you should be a pirate!

>>> On 26 July 2001 03:44:49 UTC, Jeff Anonymous wrote:

PENTIUM CHIP:  Poor Esophagus...Not Truthfully Useful Meaningfully.  Can Hurt Intestines, Parts.
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Tony

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #12 on: July 29, 2001, 05:39:03 AM »
Let's broaden the larder a little but here.....

COMPUTER MAGAZINE
Causes Overeater Mouth Problems, Upset Tummy, Excruciating Rectal Movements And Gastritis - And Zero In Nutritional Elements.

MACADDICT
Magazines Are Considered A Dainty Delicacy, If Chewed Thoughtfully
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Tony

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #13 on: July 29, 2001, 09:35:29 AM »
SOFTWARE
Shatters One's Front Teeth With A Rare Ease

HARDWARE
Have A Real Dinner Without Any Raw Electronics
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Tony

  • Guest
Do Not Eat
« Reply #14 on: July 29, 2001, 10:45:28 AM »
COMPUTER MAGAZINE (2)
Cook One's Manuals, Perhaps Until Tender, Ensures Roughage. Meals Are Generally Assumed Zero In Nutritional Effects
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